Management Doomed Peter Drucker, who single-handedly kept the world believing managers worthy of salvation, died this week. He was 92.

G$$$$$$$$$$gle This Google’s stock ran the $400 mile in under sixteen months, putting its Market Cap (market value) at $119 billion, passing such stalwarts as Cisco, Dell, Oracle, Apple, and Genentech and breathing down the necks of IBM and Intel. Even Microsoft, with a market cap of $271 billion is looking over its shoulder and is sure to come out with an ad-driven searcher of its own. At these numbers, a lot of others will follow. To me, that spells even greater googlebucks problems for Google investors buying at these insane multiples. Remember the last bubble burst that sprayed a lot of stinky brown stuff across our portfolios? No, of course not, how could we, it was almost ten years ago. Well, here’s a reminder: earnings projections were based on optimized assumed revenues ABSENT NEW COMPETITION—that’s what the Street euphemistically called new economics. Out west where I come from, it’s still known as bullshit.

The Government Made Me Do It William Weld, NY governor wannabe, said Decker College, the vocational school largely for disadvantaged blacks and Hispanics in Kentucky that financially collapsed on Weld’s watch as $700 thousand per year CEO, was driven to bankruptcy by the Federal Government. One of Decker’s investors, the partially eponymous Leeds Weld, is an investment firm chaired by ex-NYC mayor of note, Rudy Giuliani. So what we’ve got here is a Republican investment company run by not so shabby Republicans, one of whom wants to be the next Republican governor of New York and one of whom thinks the Republicans actually have a shot at the White House in 2008 and that he’s their best hope, blaming a Republican Federal Government for the failure of a school that left a bunch of kids whose parents likely vote Democratic out a bunch of money. Hmmmm. Maybe Weld’s right.

Questions of the Week
1. When the current U.S. administration starts jailing we the people, as political dissidents, where will it put us?
2. Should we declare the day after Election Day national Deficit Disclosure Day when the newly elected representatives of we the people tell the truth about how much our misinformed vote will cost?
3. How should we kill our enemies?
4. Are we surprised that the Iraqi’s torture prisoners?
5. If you have the same intelligence as I, except I know it’s flawed, is it the same intelligence?

Lego My Logo Danish Lego, as in plastic toy bricks, sued Canadian Mega Bloks, as in plastic toy bricks, for trademark infringement, Lego suggesting that its uniquely designed plastic toy bricks were so intrinsic that they had become an unregistered trademark. The Canadian Supreme Court told the Danes what they could do with their Lego’s. The Canadians and Danes are also exchanging sharp words over some piss ant island (Hans Island) near Greenland. Are they becoming the Israelis and Arabs or the Irish Protestants and Catholics of the next century? Will Canada create Danish internment camps? Will Great Danes henceforth in Canada be known as Great Canadians?

Grim, Dark, Raid Disney films? You bet. The Brothers Grimm; Dark Water; The Great Raid; they sound more like an Eisner management trilogy. And Disney wonders why it loses money on its films? Hey Mickey, wake up. You’re supposed to be the happy people.

Used Balloons For Sale How’d you like to find out that your doc has a profit sharing plan with the hospital? More and more they do, and one way the takers of the Hippocratic oath line their pockets is by reusing artery balloons. So far, it seems they confine their re-launches to the same schlub, but can an E-Bay listing be far behind, right above used heart pumps, pacemakers, and joints. At least, so far as we know, the practice hasn’t spread to planned parenthood clinics.

Corporate Crook Update
1. The Lord, as in Conrad Black, the deposed newspaper business (as in Hollinger International) mogul, got his yesterday: an eleven count indictment was served up in the Windy City charging him and three former colleagues with stealing $51.8 million from Hollinger. A piker, when you compare him to jailbird Kozlowski from Tyco: Kozlowski and friends helped themselves to about three times as much and when it comes to wives birthday parties at company expense, Conrad was a cheapskate: $40 thousand compared to Denny boys $2 million. The Black lady, or is it Lady Black, ought to get herself a really big crook if she wants to have a really big birthday bash. P.S. I believe The Lord is missing, perhaps hiding out in the homeland he discarded in favor of the fount of his titular supremacy—it shouldn’t be too hard to find 25 million or so Canadians willing to help send him south of the 49th to face the music.

Jail Jesse While governor of Minnesota, matalist Jesse Ventura could operate all the casino’s voters allowed, but private citizen Jesse might get the slammer for promoting offshore internet gambling. Other big names form Hollywood, sports, and TV face similar threats. If nothing else, it will force governments into the business and possibly even have them update all of their onshore lottos to make losing money faster and more fun. Maybe the IRS should get into the business and eliminate income taxes. I mean, wouldn’t you sooner give the money than have it taken?

Our Friends in Washington Update
1. More leaking? Bob Woodward of Deep Throat fame says someone told him two years ago that the wife of a noisy White House critic worked for the CIA. Psssst! Bob. Talk to Judy Miller. They’re putting people who don’t rat in jail now. Think of all the talk shows you’ll miss. The problem, as in Plumbing 101, is not the leaks, but the pipes that cause the leaks; if Washington stops trying to hide behind itself it seems to me the leaks stop.
2. Cheney and Bush are playing the unpatriotic card again, lashing and bashing and smashing war critics with vitriol speak.
3. Remember Judge Alito, hopeful Supreme Court man? Senate Dems and Reps are taking off the gloves. Why all the saber rattling. If enough senators want him, he’s in. Next case.
4. My Three Sons. An advocacy group wants the SEC to expand its enquiry into Senator Frist’s well-timed stock sales to include similarly well-timed stock sales by his three sons. Seems a long way from Steve, Mike, Robbie, and Chip of Fred MacMurray days.

So The Government Hires This Crook…Robert Stein, an ex-con for felony fraud, gets hired as comptroller and financial officer (known felony fraud incubators) for the American occupation authority in Iraq who puts him in charge of $82 million. It didn’t take Stein long to figure out the kickback game, putting himself down for $200 thousand a month. Bribes were paid, some for real estate, some for new cars, some for home improvements, some for jewelry, some deposited into the Stein’s accounts, but the most interesting was $7 thousand for towing services for Mrs. Stein. Buyer beware: don’t buy a Toyota previously owned by Mrs. Stein of North Carolina.

Stolen Laptop Shows Iran’s Nuke, Believe It It’s like this, see: the CIA calls a bunch of bigs to the top of a skyscraper in Vienna, overlooking the Danube no less (this makes it more CIAish) and tells them this stolen Iranian laptop computer they just happen to have in their possession contains proof that Iran is designing a nuclear warhead. What’s next, Condi showing it to the world through the UN, pointing to long silver tubes that are mobile WMD and the President barnstorming Ohio and Kentucky to round up support for another war? An even bigger outrage: some of those present suggested the CIA might have fabricated the data.